Zoo vs. Swimming

December 21st, 2011 by Slim (Knoxville, Tennessee)

Back when I lived in K-Town I took this really fine girl that I had known since high school on a date. Originally, she had wanted us to go to the Knoxville Zoo. But since zoos stink really bad and if I wanted to watch monkeys mate I would watch the Discovery Channel, I tried persuading her to go on a short cruise on one of K-Town’s riverboats. Immediately after I had suggested it she tells me that she can’t swim and hates fish. I laugh, and say we’ll only be on a boat today and there would be no swimming involved. She hesitates, but caves in. We buy our tickets and prepare to board. At this point I believe she begins warming up to the cruise idea because she becomes really chatty and admires the local scenery a great deal. We go to board and up the ramp we go. About midway one of her heel gets stuck in a hole in the ramp and she just flips backwards right in to an elderly couple. This makes them fall and no longer gives my date anything to brace herself against so she slips under the railing and falls right in to the water. At this point, my emotions are mixed with shock and laughter. I get off the ramp and wade down in to the water to her and she is FURIOUS and says she had known something like this would happen and that we should have went to the zoo instead.

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